• Corein Carter

5 Tips To Help Get Over Your Ex

Trying to wrap your head around a breakup, a separation, or a good old fashioned "ghosting" isn't the easiest thing but it is definitely achievable. Never mind the sick feeling you get when you think of him or her, or the tears that may come to your eyes when you think of your past experience, Trust me this too shall past. Lets focus on some key steps that will help you get back on your feet and ready to conquer whatever else is ahead of you. Hopefully down the line somewhere its creating the space for new that new bae.

1. Stop Keeping Tabs of Them

The First roadblock that's gonna get you over that Ex of yours is letting go of Social media connections. If you know you can't stop looking at his or her instagram page or can't stop checking his or her friends snap chat or insta-story feed to spy on what they all could be up to you may need to do a simple block, unfollow, or take a break from the app until you can come to a point where the aren't so relevant to your thought process. When i say stop keeping tabs i mean your friends as well too. We all know that one friend who thinks they are doing us good by giving us the scoop on everything that Ex-bae is doing. Politely let your friend know that you are good off of knowing anything about your Ex and you rather for them to keep it to themselves or to stop checking up on them.

2. Get Rid of Any Reminders

Rather your getting rid of old cards, love letters, gifts, photos, or even something as simple as a text message thread its beyond necessary to let go of the things in your presence that can set you back in the state of mind of wondering what if or even make you upset. Ridding yourself of all past reminders allows space for you grow instead of reverting back to missing whats now in your past.

3. Do Not Contact Them

Under no circumstances should you still be in communication with someone you claim you are trying to get over. Ask yourself what exactly is the purpose. You can't rise to the new level of a video game if you are still stuck on the level beforehand and can't seem to master how to beat it. Cease all communication/interaction in that getting over them phase this includes social media, activities, frequent hot spots to go, text messages, phone calls etc. Drunk texting is the ultimate set back. If you feel like you may slip put his or her number under a name you will forget that you changed it to once your drunk or delete it period.For those of you who work with an ex or have children with someone it may not be that easy to cease all communication but you do have the power to limit the communication/interaction to the very minimum that it need to be at.

4. Let Reality Seep In (IT'S OVER)

Stop running from the fact that its over. If you allow yourself to think of the "what if's" or "what could have been's" then you create room for delusion to occur. Cry about it, Talk about it, take the necessary steps to focus on what is going on in the current moment. Being present and realizing what the actual circumstances are with Ex-bae it may actually give you deep clarity. When you think about what he or she has done or hasn't done enough of or maybe even he simple fact that you guys just aren't a good match you can position yourself to accept what has occurred and be willing to do some healing and move on.

5. Boost Your Self Esteem

Put more focus on yourself and the things you want out of life, a relationship, career etc. I recommend grabbing a journal and writing down the things you require in all these aspects of your life and refer there when you get distracted. I can guarantee that Ex of yours is focusing on leveling themselves up and so should you. Value yourself more and allow yourself to meet new people that share the same interests as you and add to your life purpose rather that be new friends or simply dating. If you aren't at the stage of putting yourself out there just yet, look into seeking some support rather that be therapy, group chats,meetups, discussions and maybe even confiding in those close friends and family. Put yourself first by taking the necessary step to wanting to get past what has held you down. You got this Glow up King or Queen. Stay Present.



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